A Bittersweet Season

Caring for Our Aging Parents-- and Ourselves

Author: Jane Gross

Publisher: Vintage

ISBN: 030747240X

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 434

View: 3012

In telling the story of her own struggle to learn how to care for her aging and ailing mother, a journalist offers helpful insights and advice to other caregivers who feel overwhelmed. Reprint.

A Bittersweet Season

Caring for Our Aging Parents--and Ourselves

Author: Jane Gross

Publisher: Knopf

ISBN: 0307596680

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 368

View: 814

Just a few of the vitally important lessons in caring for your aging parent—and yourself—from Jane Gross in A Bittersweet Season As painful as the role reversal between parent and child may be for you, assume it is worse for your mother or father, so take care not to demean or humiliate them. Avoid hospitals and emergency rooms, as well as multiple relocations from home to assisted living facility to nursing home, since all can cause dramatic declines in physical and cognitive well-being among the aged. Do not accept the canard that no decent child sends a parent to a nursing home. Good nursing home care, which supports the entire family, can be vastly superior to the pretty trappings but thin staffing of assisted living or the solitude of being at home, even with round-the-clock help. Important Facts Every state has its own laws, eligibility standards, and licensing requirements for financial, legal, residential, and other matters that affect the elderly, including qualification for Medicare. Assume anything you understand in the state where your parents once lived no longer applies if they move. Many doctors will not accept new Medicare patients, nor are they legally required to do so, especially significant if a parent is moving a long distance to be near family in old age. An adult child with power of attorney can use a parent’s money for legitimate expenses and thus hasten the spend-down to Medicaid eligibility. In other words, you are doing your parent no favor—assuming he or she is likely to exhaust personal financial resources—by paying rent, stocking the refrigerator, buying clothes, or taking him or her to the hairdresser or barber. From the Hardcover edition.

A Bittersweet Season

Caring for Our Aging Parents-- and Ourselves

Author: Jane Gross

Publisher: Knopf

ISBN: 030727182X

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 350

View: 7230

In telling the story of her own struggle to learn how to care for her aging and ailing mother, a journalist offers helpful insights and advice to other caregivers who feel overwhelmed.

When the Time Comes

Families with Aging Parents Share Their Struggles and Solutions

Author: Paula Span

Publisher: Grand Central Life & Style

ISBN: 0446552224

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 288

View: 1978

What will you do when you get the call that a loved one has had a heart attack or a stroke? Or when you realize that a family member is too frail to live alone, but too healthy for a nursing home? Journalist Paula Span shares the resonant narratives of several families who faced these questions. Each family contemplates the alternatives in elder care (from assisted living to multigenerational living to home care, nursing care, and at the end, hospice care) and chooses the right path for its needs. Span writes about the families' emotional challenges, their practical discoveries, and the good news that some of them find a situation that has worked for them and their loved ones. And many find joy in the duty of caring for an older loved one. There are 45 million Americans caring for family members currently, and as the 77 million boomers continue to age, this number will only go up. Paula Span's stories are revealing and informative. They give a sense of all the emotional and practical factors that go into the major decisions about caregiving, so that readers will be better able to figure out what to do when the time comes for them and their loved ones.

The Caregiver's Survival Handbook

How to Care for Your Aging Parent Without Losing Yourself

Author: Alexis Abramson,Mary Anne Dunkin

Publisher: Penguin

ISBN: 9780399529986

Category: Self-Help

Page: 263

View: 7432

A practical handbook for women confronting the problems of caring for an aging parent explains how to deal with the changing parent/child roles, foster aging parents' independence, get help from other family members, find time for oneself, and balance work, family, and caregiving responsibilities. Original.

Coping with Your Difficult Older Parent

A Guide For Stressed Out Children

Author: Grace Lebow,Barbara Kane,Irwin Lebow

Publisher: Harper Collins

ISBN: 0062111965

Category: Self-Help

Page: 224

View: 9490

Do You Have An Aging Parent Who -- Blames you for everything that goes wrong? Cannot tolerate being alone, wants you all the time? Is obsessed with health problems, real, or imagined? Make unreasonable and/or irrational demands of you? Is hostile, negative and critical? Coping with these traits in parents is an endless high-stress battle for their children. Though there's no medical defination for "difficult" parents, you know when you have one. While it's rare for adults to change their ways late in life, you can stop the vicious merry-go-round of anger, blame, guilt and frustration. For the first time, here's a common-sense guide from professionals, with more than two decades in the field, on how to smooth communications with a challenging parent. Filled with practical tips for handling contentious behaviors and sample dialogues for some of the most troubling situations, this book addresses many hard issues, including: How to tell your parent he or she cannot live with you. How to avoid the cycle of nagging and recriminations How to prevent your parent's negativity from overwhelming you. How to deal with an impaired parent who refuses to stop driving. How to asses the risk factors in deciding whether a parent is still able to live alone.

Necessary Conversations

Between Families and Their Aging Parents

Author: Gerald Kaufman,L. Marlene Kaufman

Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

ISBN: 1680991841

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 200

View: 537

In this timely book, long-time family counselors, Gerald and Marlene Kaufman, urge aging people, their adult children, family members, and other caretakers to talk directly with each other about the decisions that lie ahead as they age. "Do it before a crisis hits," say the Kaufmans. "A good time to start is when the parents retire." Necessary Conversations focuses on four primary areas: Parents' finances Parents' medical care Parents' living arrangements When to stop driving This honest and resourceful guide for aging adults and their family members includes helpful suggestions for starting these conversations and overcoming confrontation.

Caring for Your Parents

The Complete Family Guide

Author: Hugh Delehanty,Elinor Ginzler,Mary Bray Pipher

Publisher: Sterling Publishing Company, Inc.

ISBN: 140275857X

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 238

View: 2755

"Practical advice you can trust from the experts at AARP"--Cover.

My Mother, Your Mother

What to Expect As Parents Age

Author: Dennis McCullough

Publisher: Harper Collins

ISBN: 006186353X

Category: Health & Fitness

Page: 288

View: 3037

What's the right thing to do for mom and dad as they get older? Thanks to advances in science and medicine, more of our parents are living longer than ever before. And though we are rewarded with more time with the people we love, we are also faced with new sets of complications—more diseases, more disability, more need for support and careful judgments. Yet while our health care system may help people live to an older age, it doesn't perform so well when decline eventually sets in. We want to do the best thing but are overwhelmed with the staggering choices we face. Geriatrician Dennis McCullough has spent his life helping families to cope with their parents' aging and eventual final passage, experiences he faced with his own mother. In this comforting and much-needed book, he recommends a new approach, which he terms "Slow Medicine." Shaped by common sense and kindness, grounded in traditional medicine yet receptive to alternative therapies, Slow Medicine advocates for careful anticipatory "attending" to an elder's changing needs rather than waiting for crises that force acute medical interventions—an approach that improves the quality of elders' extended late lives without bankrupting their families financially or emotionally. As Dr. McCullough argues, we need to learn that time and kindness are sometimes more important and humane at these late stages than state-of-the-art medical interventions. My Mother, Your Mother will help you learn how to: —form an early and strong partnership with your parents and siblings; —strategize on connecting with doctors and other care providers; —navigate medical crises; —create a committed Advocacy Team; —reach out with greater empathy and awareness; and —face the end-of-life time with confidence and skill. Although taking care of those who have always cared for us is not an easily navigated time of life, My Mother, Your Mother will help you and your family to prepare for this complex journey. This is not a plan for getting ready to die; it is a plan for understanding, for caring, and for helping those you love live well during their final years. And the time to start is now.

The Caregiving Season

Finding Grace to Honor Your Aging Parents

Author: Jane Daly

Publisher: NavPress

ISBN: 1624057675

Category: Religion

Page: 208

View: 5145

Caring for elderly parents is challenging. It’s a season of life that requires grace and strength that can only come from God. In The Caregiving Season, Jane Daly shares personal caregiving stories, offering practical advice to help you honor your aging parents well and deepen your personal relationship with Christ along the journey.

How to Care for Aging Parents

A One-Stop Resource for All Your Medical, Financial, Housing, and Emotional Issues

Author: Virginia Morris

Publisher: Workman Publishing

ISBN: 0761166769

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 671

View: 4341

Completely revised and updated, this comforting and authoritative guide offers support and advice for those caring for an elderly relative or friend, incorporating recent medical findings, information on fraud, helpful online resources and "aging in place" technologies. Original.

Holding the Net

Caring for My Mother on the Tightrope of Aging

Author: Melanie P. Merriman

Publisher: N.A

ISBN: 9780998701226

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 240

View: 8285

In this poignant and timely memoir, Melanie Merriman shares her struggle to care for her fiercely independent aging mother. When her father dies, Melanie commits herself to making the rest of her mother’s life the best it can be. She brings knowledge to the situation―as a hospice consultant, she has studied aging, illness, and the intricacies of the healthcare system―and she has a sister who is willing to help. But even with these advantages, Melanie finds the real-life experience of caring for her mother humbling. Every decision becomes a tug of war, with Mom on one side, fighting for her independence, and the two sisters on the other, trying to keep her safe. A win for either side suddenly feels like a loss for all. Written for people who have cared for a parent, are currently facing that challenge, or are aging parents themselves, Holding the Net offers practical details about the effects of aging on the body and mind, living arrangements for older people, health care decisions, and surviving rehab. It also challenges the notion that anyone can be an expert when it comes to caring for an aging parent, and encourages us to simply do our best. Melanie hits all the right notes, and her story will have readers nodding their heads and shedding healing tears.

The Sandwich Generation's Guide to Eldercare

Author: Danielle Schultz Dresden, MEd, CRC,Phillip D. Rumrill, Jr., PhD, CRC,Kimberly McCrone Wickert, MRC, CRC

Publisher: Demos Medical Publishing

ISBN: 161705142X

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 246

View: 969

Gold Winner, 2013 Foreword Reviews IndieFab Book of the Year Awards, Family & Relationships Category A practical, accessible, and comprehensive guide to the legal, financial, emotional and daily living challenges of caring for aging parents while raising your own family. If you are caring for an elderly loved one while raising a child, you may feel overwhelmed and unprepared. The Sandwich Generationís Guide to Eldercare, written by three experts with extensive professional and personal experience with eldercare, provides the information and resources you need to make important decisions, balance your responsibilities, and ensure your elders well-being as well as your own. It includes how to: Create a good eldercare plan and the key financial, healthcare, and legal documents you should have executed Choose the right level of care and ease the transition, including how to avoid the most common mistakes people make in this process Find the best ways to help elderly loved ones maintain their independence and dignity Navigate the maze of government agencies and benefits Involve other family members while minimizing tension or conflict Prevent caregiver burnout and deal with the strain on family life, children, and relationships With useful checklists, worksheets, step-by-step action plans, lists of questions to ask, and a robust resources section, you'll have everything you need to care for your family.

Caring for Yourself While Caring for Your Aging Parents, Third Edition

How to Help, How to Survive

Author: Claire Berman

Publisher: Macmillan

ISBN: 9780805079753

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 255

View: 3380

A thoroughly revised guide for adult children of aging parents addresses such issues as guilt, long-distance caregiving, monetary concerns, and other practical and emotional issues, with all new sections on the Internet as a tool for seniors, new sources of prescription drugs, information on emergency response systems, and recommended exercises. Original. 17,500 first printing.

Take My Hand Again

A Faith-Based Guide for Helping Aging Parents

Author: Brummett, Nancy Parker

Publisher: Kregel Publications

ISBN: 0825443717

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 224

View: 8149

The guide the author wishes she had when she took on a caretaker role.
By 2020, the senior population in this country will number over 115 million. Despite this persistent “graying” of America, few adult children feel prepared to take on the role of caregiver for aging parents. Those who discover they must now intervene and care for an elder they love are often at a loss. Trying to navigate the transition is like being dropped in a foreign country with no map, no GPS, and no translator—and acting as tour guide.
Nancy Parker Brummett knows what they’re going through and has the means to help. She shares her own experience of caring for a mother and mother-in-law in assisted living, as well as lessons learned through study of the academic, social, and political issues involved. Each chapter begins with relevant Scripture, but the useful information here is not limited to people of faith.
Take My Hand Again offers readers the warm feeling of having someone they trust stepping up to hold their hand and share encouragement and hope. Children of the aging don’t need a degree in gerontology; they just need for someone to ask the pertinent questions and give them an overview of the pros and cons of common options so they can make informed decisions. Whether they’ve already had their wake-up call or just want to be prepared for what’s to come, Brummett’s sometimes humorous, sometimes poignant book has just what they’re looking for.

Love in the Land of Dementia

Finding Hope in the Caregiver's Journey

Author: Deborah Shouse

Publisher: Central Recovery Press, LLC

ISBN: 1937612503

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 180

View: 7159

Caregiver Shouse celebrates spiritual and practical lessons learned on her unscripted yet rewarding journey with her mother through Alzheimer's disease.

Changing Places

A Christian's Guide to Caring for Aging Parents

Author: Betty Benson Robertson

Publisher: Beacon Hill Press

ISBN: 9780834120242

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 104

View: 8163

People who face the demanding task of caring for an aging parent often have no idea what to expect.Changing Places includes resources for:Organizing the care-giving processSelecting an appropriate housing optionUntangling legal and financial issuesCoping with the emotional challengesFinding help in the communityNurturing your spiritual walk in the midst of difficult timesIncludes forms, checklists, and how-to’s for caring for your loved ones

How to Protect Your Family's Assets from Devastating Nursing Home Costs

Medicaid Secrets

Author: K. Gabriel Heiser

Publisher: MedicaidSecrets.com

ISBN: 0979080118

Category: Law

Page: 237

View: 2474

Written by an elder law attorney with over 23 years experience, this book will help anyone with a family member faced with a long-term stay in a nursing home who wishes to preserve at least some of their assets by qualifying for the Medicaid program. You dont have to be broke to qualify! For the first time ever, the inside secrets of high-priced estate planning and elder law attorneys are revealed. Includes a summary of all income and asset rules for both married and single individuals, together with numerous examples and several case studies, which take the reader through the same thought processes that an experienced elder law attorney would go through when analyzing a real-life clients situation. The book includes tips on: how to title your home so you do not lose it to the state; how to make transfers to family members that wont disqualify you from Medicaid; how annuities make assets disappear; smart tricks for spending down your assets; what to change in your will to save thousands of dollars if your spouse ever needs nursing home care; avoiding the states reimbursement claim following the nursing home residents death; and much more. Completely up-to-date, the book includes the massive changes made by the Deficit Reduction Act of 2005 as well as the December 2006 Tax Relief and Health Care Act amendments.

Home Care How to

The Guide to Starting Your Senior in Home Care Business

Author: Brendan John

Publisher: Lulu.com

ISBN: 0983183201

Category: Business & Economics

Page: 232

View: 5249

Home Care How To is an in depth guide to helping anyone start and run their own in home care business. You will learn the systems and step-by-step activities required to setting up and operating your elder care company. Discover the secrets, opportunities and pitfalls to watch for that other senior care and home health agency franchisees pay tens of thousands for! Find out how to staff your business with excellent care providers and how to effectively market your services to the growing number of aging baby boomers and their parents.

The Gift of Caring

Saving Our Parents from the Perils of Modern Healthcare

Author: M. Cottrell S. Houle,M. D. M. P. H. Eckstrom

Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield

ISBN: 1630760986

Category: Family & Relationships

Page: 320

View: 1015

The desire to help our elders navigate health issues is clear and universal—how to assure proper care and a good ending is not. Combining adroit storytelling skills with expert advice, The Gift of Caring: Saving Our Parents from the Perils of Modern Healthcare brings the reader into all-too-familiar scenarios facing our aging parents and offers answers to questions we may not know to ask until it’s too late. Author and biologist Marcy Houle shares her personal journey of caring for her father, a surgeon, who developed Alzheimer’s, and later her mother, who succumbed to other medical conditions. Like many children of aging parents, Marcy often felt powerless traveling this sad trajectory—watching them fall through the cracks of a fragmented and confusing healthcare system, where professionals often wrote off their symptoms as “just old age.” Not having the understanding of the changes that come with aging, she was led to believe there was nothing she could do to help. The tragic secret? According to coauthor and geriatrics physician Elizabeth Eckstrom, these symptoms frequently are not “just old age.” Rather, the problem is that the current healthcare delivery model for older people is ill-equipped to provide the comprehensive, person-centered care seniors need. Today, thousands of aging people face unnecessary suffering, hospitalizations, nursing home stays, and even death due to complications that could have been prevented or treated. Even more troubling, many healthcare professionals have had little or no training in the care of older adults. The Gift of Caring reveals these pitfalls and provides families with tools they can use to avoid them. Interspersed with every few chapters of Marcy’s riveting story, Dr. Eckstrom shares professional medical insights, compiled from the latest research, into what Marcy could have done to safeguard her parents. She shows us how to navigate the system, how we can become our loved one’s best advocate, and what we need to know to achieve healthy aging and meaningful, compassionate final years. Honest, at times humorous, and ultimately uplifting, The Gift of Caring sheds new light on aging from twin perspectives: a story of a daughter desperately seeking help for the parents she loves, and a geriatrician who gives us the knowledge we need to insist upon a better way.